OK. I've received some feedback from my last post 'Thoughts' and I really appreciate it. But I don't think I expressed myself clearly though, or maybe I did. I'm not entirely sure. I'm in major need of something new in my life, some kind of change. Could be as simple as a haircut or as drastic as moving to a new city. All I know is that something needs to change. And maybe that skewed my thinking in the last post in a direction I didn't mean for it to go.
But what I wanted to clarify is that despite my pondering on how things could have been (you can't help but wonder and think about the 'what ifs'), I wouldn't change anything. I love the things I have done. I loved University. I even miss it sometimes. I guess I was just thinking that I didn't need to go to school and get a degree to be happy with my life (especially because it's useless and I'm not using it. Not much one can do with an English Major besides teach or write...). I just think that life doesn't have to be so complicated and that most of the time, simple is best. I feel like I've made things in my life more complicated than they needed to be. And I was just thinking that simple might have been a nice route to take. I don't regret my education though and it's not my student loans that are the problems. Choices that seemed good and right at the time were made and in hindsight, weren't so great. That's life. It happens. I just need to make smarter choices in the future ;)
And as for the car and house and trip thing, I totally realize that lots of people may look put together on the outside and are struggling just as much or even more than I am. Debt comes in all kinds of forms and so does the stress that goes along with it. I think that thought about wishing we were able to have a newer car or a house or go on trips came from the fact that I need a change. The new to me car that I just got SUCKS ASS and I feel so ripped off by it and I'm bitter about it, really really bitter. And as for the house, I love our little house. The only problem is that it's too little and we've outgrown it. And doesn't everyone need to get away once in a while???
Anyways, I don't regret my choices and I wouldn't change anything, but I was just thinking about some of the 'what ifs' and how things might have been.
Something new in your life.
ReplyDeleteWell...
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There are always what ifs... hindsight is 20/20 right? ;) As long as we learn from our experiences and are happy with our choices. And you're right, everyone does need to get away every once in a while... you're always welcome at my house! ;) And maybe you should egg the house of the person you bought the car from? I'll supply the eggs, you supply the getaway vehicle!
ReplyDeleteDamn Lissy, I think I missed out on that incredible offer!!! But technically, I couldn't publish the post until it was read...so could my 10 mins start after that?? If so, I will take it!!! I have always wanted a Bright and Shiny Lissy and a Spunky Kim - how did you know???
ReplyDeleteAnd Maya, I would love to come to your house...but I think I need a more reliable vehicle for the getaway ;)